Children and Museums: The Crime of Babywearing

Our family attempted to visit the De Young Museum on February 15th. Midway through our visit, we were asked to leave. What had we done wrong? My husband and I were "wearing" both boys (one eight months old, one three and a half) in sling-style soft back carriers. You see.... you're not allowed to wear backpacks in the De Young. They're afraid you'll lose track of your personal boundaries, and bash into something. Doubly so with children. Therefore, they must be in strollers, or on your front. This is a deeply child-hostile policy, on three fronts. The first front is on a comfort/attention/behavior viewpoint. Parents who take their children out into the world bear, in my opinon, an obligation to keep them entertained, mannerly, and engaged. The museum's policy makes that all but impossible. The second front is a philosophical consideration. People appreciate what they know. If you're going to raise a child who appreciates art, you must expose them to it in a positive way, get them excited about it. How in the world are you to do that, if attending a museum is an uncomfortable, awkward, boring experience? Third, it assumes that the babywearing parent is somehow unconscious of where their child is. That would be analogous to banning wheelchairs, because the handicapped person might lose track of where their wheels are. It sorely underestimates the union between the babywearing dyad. The museum's current policy on back carries marginalizes those of us who are both willing and able to control our children, and want very much to introduce them not only to art, but to the art of correct social behavior in such facilities. In discussing my upset with other babywearing, museum-going parents, I've discovered that the experience, with regards to the acceptance of soft back-carriers, is inconsistent. The Metropolitan Museum in New York rents them for use. The San Francisco Museum of Modern Art consistently asks people babywearing to leave. And about half of the parents who've visited the De Young were asked to leave, while the other half enjoyed their visits uninterrupted. It's my hope that some sort of compromise, or waiver policy, may be achieved, not only at the De Young, but at museums everywhere. I also understand that there may be some sort of insurance or other complication that makes that unattainable in the short term. But as babywearing parents, I think it's incumbent on us to challenge these sorts of policies, and do what we can to educate policymakers. If you have a picture of you and your child in a back carry at a museum location, I would very much appreciate it if you'd send it along for inclusion. Should that fail to have the desired effect, next stop is a letter-writing campaign. Stay tuned, either for the Happy Dance, or the Call to Action, whichever's necessary. =) Thanks to everyone who's offered me support in this so far. I know it seems a little thing. But I fully intend to raise children who are comfortable in cultural institutions, and know how to behave appropriately, and I will not allow some poorly-thought-out policy get in my way. Stay tuned. And thanks for your support.